When I became a mum I’d expected to struggle with the lack of sleep and endless nappy changes. But it wasn’t those things that I found most difficult. It caught me by surprise, but the hardest thing I found after becoming a mum was my time no longer belonging to me.
The lack of control over my time and the constant interruptions…..to my sleep, to my thoughts, to my to-do-list was quite frankly overwhelming. And that was before I tried to integrate my work back into my life!
Once I tried to combine my work and motherhood….well….if you know my story then you’ll know that’s where I knew women like you and me needed more support and Wisdom For Working Mums was born.
And this was also before our smartphones seemed to be so all consuming. The level of distractions for us working mums has reached epidemic levels.
If we don’t get a grip of our distractions then the impact is profound. Not only on our ability to get things done, but on our sense of enjoyment in life. Being able to be fully present with the people and things that truly matter.
When we feel so overwhelmed by distractions we don’t have the space (in our minds, in our hearts and in our bodies) to process what really matters in our lives.
And the heartbreaking reality is that nowhere is safe from distractions anymore. Even the places that used to be sacred for us to be present with our loved ones, and ourselves, have been hijacked by technology. Statistically we are more likely to be in connection with our smartphone than with our significant other when we get home.
There are many distractions in our lives as working mums that we can’t control, but there are some that we can. And probably more than we think…..starting with our phones! Technology is designed to distract us but distraction isn’t technology. Distraction is confusion about what matters.
As distraction expert Curt Steinhorst explains,
“That confusion is uncomfortable, and so we naturally seek clarity. We reach for something, anything, that resolves the confusion by providing an immediate sense of purpose. The smartphone, then, isn’t a “distraction”—it’s simpler than that. The smartphone is just a very efficient “sense-of-purpose-creating” machine, and when we are confused, it’s almost always nearby.”
So if distraction is confusion, then clarity and purpose are the true first steps towards focusing on what truly matters according to Steinhorst.
We have to do a better job of defining, communicating and living what matters most. Right here, right now in our lives with the people that matter…..starting with ourselves.
But, if I could read your mind, I’d probably hear you say “That sounds great Nicky, but I’m overwhelmed. I don’t have time to focus on my urgent to-do list, let alone have think about what matters most to me”.
That’s where I can help. I work with my clients to help them to refocus (and sometimes redefine) on what truly matters to them. And redesign their lives to be able to be present for those things.
For some clients it’s a one off 90 minute coaching session that can help them to do this. For others it’s a Wisdom Day (an in-depth VIP coaching day). For others it’s a coaching programme that enables them to really reflect and redesign their lives to make the changes over a 3 or 6 month period.
I learnt 14 years ago in a very painful way how easy it is to let life take over and lose sight of what truly matters. When my mum died suddenly it was a heartbreaking lesson that I’d let the things that didn’t really matter in life impact the things that did.
I made it my mission then to help people like you and me to never let this happen again. So if you need help to focus on what really matters as a working mum, and get out of the overwhelm and never-ending distractions, then I’ve got your back!
Here’s to clarity and purpose so we can focus on what truly matters to us!